How to Get Over Your EX – A Guide to Change your Life (For Men)

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Did you just have a breakup? Your girl cheated on you? Well, I’m sure you feel like its the world end for you. Your heart is broken. You can only feel the pain and loneliness of the breakup. Let’s face it the emotions which you are going through are painful and breakup hurts like hell. Trust me I have been there broken hurt and crying about what went wrong.

So what really went wrong?? I’m sure you tried asking that. You probably got a confusing response or worse no response at all. You are not even sure what to do anymore. Hopefully, you decided to get over your Ex and move on. So what can you do to fix the missing part of you? How can you move on from your EX to whom you loved so deeply now that you are feeling restless and alone?

breakup with ex

No, it’s not just you everyone going through hard breakup experiences the same feelings. The answer is simple to understand but hard at the same time. The answer is to be a better person than you were before. You need to level up as a man. That girl was not the right one for you. And if you are really this miserable because of her it means you loved her and she didn’t value it. What do I mean leveling up?. Don’t worry the Mr. Cupid will help you move on from your Ex if you follow the step by step method of EX detoxing.

Let me elaborate on what you can do to move on from your EX:

First, take a deep breath to try to calm down. If you are reading this post on the day of the breakup then I know your heart is a mess. But you need to listen to your brain right now. Take a pen and paper and write down whatever that comes to your mind after reading the following questions. Write it down. Also, write everything you are feeling right now at this moment

Ask yourself these questions:

  • Why do I, as a person exist, Is romance, and women the only thing I care about in my life?
  • What did I do wrong in the relationship or Did I actually do anything wrong?
  • Is dating the only goal of my life?
  • Did she really make me a better person? Did she help me grow as a man
  • Is crying and worrying about my EX really going to help me right now?
  • Is she really worth more than my happiness, friends, family, and career goals?

I hope you feel calmer after doing the above exercise. This will help you clear the unnecessary mix of emotions in your heart. And give some time to your brain to actually think and not overload with emotions.

Now let me tell you why you feel what you feel and why it hurts. The reason is: You think your girlfriend is special and that you need her to complete you. You think she is your soul mate and you feel that you won’t get a better girl.

Reality check brother: She is just another human being. Stop thinking that she is a goddess or one of a kind girl. If you take a headcount of guys who cannot move on from their Ex because she was special. You will find at least 10-15 million Guys. So are there really 10-15 million special girls on this planet if not more. So how is that you say she is unique.

You see the problem here right. You feel that your girlfriend is the best girl on this planet simply because you have not met anyone else better than her. This is also the reason why girls move on easily after a breakup and guys don’t. Girls have lots of guys who are willing to take your role and you get replaced quite easily. You on the other hand have very few girls in your life. So stop thinking that she is so special. She is just another girl who at best might be slightly good looking than average. You are making her special in your mind and messing yourself up.

So did she really love you as she said??

The answer is probably not. Else why would she suddenly stop? Remember attraction is not the same as love. True love comes after you have been with someone for more than a year at least. By that time, all attraction settles down. The emotional high goes away. By then you are two people who literally know everything about each other and should accept each other as you are.

If she really loved you she would do everything she can to fix the problems between you and her. Not break up and run away. It’s not that easy to break up with someone unless that person never truly loved you in the first place. She never loved you. It was just an attraction and emotions for her and not love. I know it’s a hard pill to swallow but understanding this is the first step to move on from your Ex.

breakup with ex

So how do I Get over My ex fast?

Now its time to clear your mind and start fixing your life. Its not a one day process as much as you wish it was it will take time but I can promise you within one month you will be over her if you do all the things mentioned in the guide. It’s a continuous process that will fix your life not just now but in the future as well. Take your time and go through each step. Only then will you be able to move on from your Ex completely. So let’s begin.

Step 1: Make a list of why you should not date her

Make a list of why you should not date your ex. Get as detailed as you can. Write it on a big paper and stick it in your bathroom and your room where you can see it daily.

You might think it’s weird or funny it’s not. Trust me it works amazingly well. Make sure the list has at least 10 points. Otherwise keep working till you reach a minimum of 10. Be as harsh as you can because that’s how you are being to yourself. You are criticizing yourself about all the things you did wrong in the relationship. You should do the same with her. Be harsh and real.

breakup with ex

Whenever you feel like going back to her. Go through the list. It will help calm you down. You will keep getting emotional mood swings because of things that remind you of her. These emotions make it difficult to move on from your Ex. This is one of the ways you can stop them from making you lose control.

Step 2: Make an EX Box

No, it’s not Xbox. Its an EX box which will have everything you have about your ex. Her pics, gifts and anything related to her. Put everything you can find about her and pack the box seal tight it. And give it to your friend. Tell him “Do not give it to me under any circumstances “

Better yet donate the gifts and things she has given. Help the poor and orphans. Trust me it works amazingly well. Delete all ways that you can reach out to her. Delete her from your life. The less toxic people you have in your life the better. You want to be happy and have less toxicity in your life.

breakup with ex

This will make sure you don’t get reminded of her. It’s not full proof but does help a lot. Out of sight is out of mind.

If you are reminded of her, you will keep getting reminded of the breakup and all the emotions you felt during the breakup. Not something I recommend to anyone. So make a EXbox

Step 3: Stay away from her

The most important thing for you right now is distance. If your ex says that she wants to be friends say NO…!!!!

This is the number one mistake all the guys do. Why do you want to be friends with someone who broke your heart? And is/will now date another guy. The only time you should be friends with your ex is when you are cool with her sleeping with your best friend. If you have zero issues with her sleeping with your best friend then you can be friends with her otherwise no.

And let’s be honest who are fooling. Be honest you don’t want to be friends with her you are just hoping she will regret her decision and come back to you. This is your way to woe her back into your life. Terrible idea but that’s what you are thinking.

Are you really that naive that you would hurt your career, family, and friends just to have her in your life where she will be dating other guys and you waiting for her as her backup option? Have some self respect my man. You are amazing you deserve better.

And to those who are saying you can be friends with your ex. Yes, you absolutely can. You can be friends with the devil also. But is it good for you?

Do you want your next girlfriend to be creeped out by you and your EX going on friend dates?

I personally would not date anyone who is too close with their EX-partners. Its a sign of a toxic relationship and clinginess. Just imagine the headache when he/she sleeps over at their ex’s place. Like that’s a horrible way to start a new relationship.

Be smart, decisive, and have some self-respect. Stop trying to please everyone. Your happiness is more important than others. Being focused on your happiness does not make you selfish. It makes you a person with self-esteem. Love yourself treat yourself.

Step 4: Make arrangements to stay away from your EX

I know its difficult to ignore your ex when she is your colleague or classmate. You will end up seeing her even if you don’t want to.

So what can you do?

Make arrangements so that you do not see her. In school or college sit at a different place. Change your seat. If you are clever enough to change your seat to get close to her than you are clever enough to make an excuse and change your seat to get away from her.

If you are at a job, then change your desk location and ignore her. If possible talk to your boss and say that you want your location changed as it will affect your productivity. Trust me they will listen when you say productivity. It’s their keyword. lol

Step 5: Join a Gym and workout.

Working out is a great stress reliever. You will be too tired to think about your ex. Listen to motivating songs. Whoever said listening to sad love songs helps needs to check his brains. It will only worsen the situation. Listen to motivational songs and workouts. Get fit and healthier. You will look amazing feel amazing.

move on from your ex

Motivation is the key brothers. You will feel a lot better. A better body will make you a healthy fit. You will also have better success when you date women in the future. Follow the other guides as well in order to learn the rest of the skills that will help you succeed with women and life in general.

Step 6: Bros before Ho*s

Pardon the language but this is a must. Stay with your friends who will help you move on. Friends are always there for you. Many guys make the mistake of hurting their friends for their girlfriends. They will spend time with their girlfriend and not their friends.

move on from your ex

Never do this mistake guys. Its a really stupid thing to do to your friends. Talk to them. Go out camping. Go out and have fun. That’s why you have friends. When you spend time with them you feel much better. Afterall everyone wants to be loved. Your friends and family are happy to do that for you. Apologise if you ignored them before.

Traveling with friends is the best cure to move on from your ex. Its literally the best breakup remedy. Have good friends make some new ones as well.

Step 7: She is never coming back. Face the truth

Stop believing in fantasies and face the truth she does not care about you. Done. That is the truth if she really cared about you why would she hurt you and break up with you for no good reason. And even if there was a reason she would try to work it out rather than break up. I mean you guys are supposed to life partners.

If there was a problem she could have talked to you and fixed it. She herself decided to leave you. If she can do it once she can definitely do it twice. If she cheated on you then definitely run the other way. There are so many girls on this planet. Why do you want the lowest quality of girls who cheat and don’t love you for who you are???

Do you really want a life partner who abandons you face difficulties in life?

And the reality is most breakups with men happen when they facing tough times. You are having a job or a business crisis. Worse a health crisis. That is when most breakups happen. So stop thinking that its a bad thing. If you were well settled earning well and healthy chances are she wouldn’t leave you. Those girls are leeches that suck the happiness from you since they have no value to give to the world. Do you really want a life partner that abandons you when you need them the most?

Raise your standards. That’s the only way you will be a better person. You don’t want a horse cart when you deserve a Lamborgini. Raise your level and standards. You deserved much better since you are an amazing guy.

Step 8: Try New Things

Its the best time to learn new things. This is the time you need to improve your achievement list. Go ace a test. Get a promotion. Start your business. Work and explore all that you can do in life. Start working on your dreams. You are amazing and you deserve the success you worked hard for. Ignore the haters and keep grinding. Learn how to improve yourself daily.

move on from your ex

You need other things to occupy your mind. Learn some skills which will help you in life and career. Take care of your parents. Do some good things for people. Help orphans. Support a cause. The best way to better yourself is by helping others and expecting nothing in return. Its time to level up brother.

Step 9: Block your ex from all social media. Period

Block your ex from all social media sites. That is the only way you will move on from your ex. Out of sight is out of mind. When you see her pics with her new boyfriend you will only end up having a bad day. The only thing you will feel is sadness and regret. Why risk it? You deserve to be happy. A person who isn’t your supporter should not be in your life.

breakup and block on social media

There are only a few people who truly care about you. To the point they would come running anytime you need them.

  • You
  • Your parents
  • One or two friends (If you are really lucky that is)

She is not one of them and by breaking up she has proved it. She made that choice when she broke up with you. Why would you spend any of your precious time for such a person that

To find out how much time you have left to live if you are an average man or woman, take your age and multiply it by 365.  Then, subtract 27,375 days from it.

  • For example, if you are 25 years old, you have 18,250 days to live (27,375 days – 9,125 (because 365 x 25 = 9,125)).
  • If you are 50 you have 9,125 days.
  • If you are 65, you have 3,650 days.

Can you really afford to spend time on her? What about your goals and dreams in life? The biggest regret most people have in life is what they could have become but choose not to. Don’t make that mistake. Be all that you can be. A man’s goal in life should not be women. It should be his dream. Women are icing on the cake, not the cake itself.

Step 10: Do not give in to your ex addiction. Never go back to her

There will be times when she calls you or messages you. You might accidentally end up meeting her as well. Frankly, you should just block her and be done with it if you ask me. She does not deserve the right to be in your life.

“Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice shame on me”

She is bored and she wants entertainment. You will be playing the role of the joker/entertainer. Backup at best. Is that what you want to be? If you do not have the self-respect to run away from such a toxic person then even god cannot help you. Stay away from your ex.

Note: No offense to jokers. It just seemed like the appropriate word to describe the idiocy we men do trying to get our exes.

Step 11: Poison is Poison. Ex is Ex

You need to learn to let go of people. I know it hurts a lot especially if you dated for long. But the breakup will show you her true colors. The fact is she choose to abandon you and hurt you by breaking up with you. Whatever may be the reason for the breakup that does change the fact that she chose it herself. No matter what do not accept her back. If she can leave once she can definitely leave you again.

breakup

If she is willing to leave you when the relationship and you are struggling in life then she definitely won’t hesitate to do it again when you are going through a tough time. Never date an EX. It will only end up badly. With so many girls on this planet, why do you want to compromise?

You are amazing and you deserve someone amazing. Stop holding on to the past and let go. Its okay you will find someone better. You really will. All you need to do is level up.

Step 12: Success is the Best Revenge

Do not get stuck on revenge. You are better than that. Many guys think that they should get revenge on their ex. No brother any time you waste on her is useless. Even if it is for revenge. When you think of taking revenge then you just proved that she was right in dumping you. Instead, be better. Level up and be the alpha male that every girl wants and every guy is jealous of. The best part it has nothing to do with your face or your looks. Be the guy who every girl dreams of dating. And yes it’s possible. The Guide to Being an alpha male shows exactly how you can do that.

move on from your ex

Just imagine the thug life situation when she becomes speechless after seeing the new you. Better yet date someone 100 times better than her. Be successful in your career. Your happiness is the most important thing for you. Never lose sight of it. Get your grooming and style game fixed. Get a good haircut and a new beard style that suits you.

Let your success make the noise. She will come running back to you and that’s when you ignore her. Success Revenge is so sweet.

Step 13: Follow your passion not your ex

If you never had enough time to work on your passion now you have it. Dating takes a lot of time out of your life. You just got plenty of free time. Use it and follow your passion. Write the book you always wanted to write. Learn the skill you always wanted to learn. Learn a new language. Start a business. Start multiple streams of income.

move on from your ex

Your happiness and your success depend on you. Do not let anyone else tell you otherwise. Dating and finding a partner is not the end goal of life. Being free and making your goal come true is the real mission. Stop running after women. They are just icing on the cake and not the cake itself. Stop expecting a girl to complete you. That’s not her job. A happy relationship requires to complete people. It’s not about completing yourself. You are amazing as you are. Improve the things you want to improve in your life. Look good feel good.

Step 14: Times heals all your wounds

If you just broke up then it will take time for you to move on from your Ex. This guide will definitely speed up the process of you moving on. But it will still take time. Because of you constantly thinking about her in the past, your mind will naturally keep thinking of her. You need to slowly remove her from your mind. As more time passes it will get easier and easier. You need at least a month to completely get over. Maybe more if you were together for more than 5 years. But remember time heals all wounds provided you stop thinking about her.

move on from your ex

You need to slowly and steadily replace her from your life. Replace her memories. Replace her completely. The more you practice the guide the faster you will heal your wounds and forget her. Your mind and time are the only weapons that can truly save you. Keep working for your goal instead. And remember you are amazing.

Step 15: Spectator Point: Understand It.

How would you advise your friend who is going through the same thing? Think of the situation from the view of a third person. The advice you give them is the same advice you need to take. Let go of your ex. Let go of the toxic person.

move on from your ex

Whenever I talk to guys. All of them ironically say the same thing.

“It’s not that simple. You do not know her. She is different. I’m sure she had some reason. I am sure I can get her back. Our situation is complicated.” Or some variation of the same.

Like wtf. You understand the irony of the situation right.

It’s not complicated guys. She dumped you because she never loved you or she does not love you anymore. To her, you were an entertainment source. Girls are more emotional than men but they love based on emotions as well. If you are no longer attractive to her she will leave you. You served her purpose she got bored now its the next guy. Its female nature where they will try to find the best guy they can and why shouldn’t they.

Know your own value. If you are not happy with who you are then you need to level up and be amazing. Understand that you are enough. Every girl will lose her beauty after 30. That’s life. Find someone who makes your life better not harder.

Step 16: Will I find true love, Will I trust anyone again?

Yes but not easily. And that’s the best thing.

You believed her when she said she loved you. Now you know she didn’t love you the way she said. This mistake you made will make you smarter. Now you will pay attention the next time someone says they love you. Breakup is the best life lesson to help you become more mature. I honestly feel every man must go through it in order to truly learn and grow mature.

move on from your ex

Being smart requires you to make mistakes. Breakup teaches you how to be smarter and more mature while selecting your partners. How will you learn without these mistakes?

Learn from it. Understand your mistakes and correct. Never make the same mistake twice. The goal is to level up not be perfect. Having a better healthier life is always better.

Step 17: Say No to rebounds

Rebounds sound like a good idea. And for some time you will enjoy it as well. I mean the romance and the physical part.

But what about the future. You never really liked her. You just used her like toilet paper. That’s the reality, isn’t it?

Also, I know the type of women men choose when they want to rebound. Its women with good looks and who have insecurities or are easy. It’s unfair to her and you just made another mistake and ruined someone’s life. And then you will break up with them. Because you never really loved them in the first place. That just made you the same as your ex. Is that how you want to be? Please don’t. Be Better.

Step 18: Say no to addictions

Do not become an addict. Many guys in order to escape the pain become addicts. Be in drugs, drinking, smoking, or some other addiction. Stop being weak. Its time you became a real man who loves himself and takes care of himself. Self-love is key to being happy. Meditate and work out. Do yoga be healthy eat healthy.

breakup

The pain will always make you stronger and it’s necessary for you to grow.

Broken hearts, hungry stomachs, and empty wallets teach the best lessons in life. Work hard and breakthrough. You are stronger than you know. You are amazing and 10 years down the line you will be thankful for the breakup.

Step 19: There are plenty of fish in the ocean

There are around 7.8 billion people on this planet. At least 3-4 billion are girls. Out of which even if you take out the young and the old and the married and the ones who are in a relationship. You still have around 1 billion women left.

You still have around a billion women left who are single. Now the number of people that are good looking as well as have a great personality are roughly 100 million.

Just imagine. Out of those you have a million options in your own country. Stop crying for one girl when there is no shortage of beautiful women in the world. Even if you live in a remote country you will have at least 100k women that you can date.

If you learn the skills of dating. Then you will easily get any girl you want. You just need to make sure that she is worth being with you. You are the prize, not her.

Keep your standards high.

Step 20: Seek professional help

If you are feeling suicidal or trying to harm yourself. Or have fallen in chronic depression. Seek help. Tell your parents. Go to a specialist who helps people deal with such issues personally. There will be plenty of people you can help you with their therapy sessions and more professional one on one help. This guide is not for extreme depression and extreme cases but it may help a bit. For severe issues I recommend professional help.

depression

It’s okay to ask for help. Your happiness has no price. Money can be earned. But you cannot get back the time you lost. Move on from your breakup.

I hope you got the ray of hope you needed to move on from your ex. It’s never easy. It’s simple but not easy. Also, a request to all readers send this to friends who are going through a breakup. They need it as well. Help each other. If you have questions about breakup and moving on then comment them below. I would be happy to help.

Never give up. Work hard and let your success make the noise..!!!

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